


Vast Carelessness

by StarPrince_Punk



Category: Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (2013)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fix-It, Happy Ending, Jay Gatsby Lives, Light Angst, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Period-Typical Homophobia, Pining, i just want my boys to be happy, nick caraway is so clearly gay for gatsby that I needed to write this, no beta we die like men, that then turns into mutual attraction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-20
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-03-08 06:59:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18889510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarPrince_Punk/pseuds/StarPrince_Punk
Summary: Canon Divergent - Takes place right after Tom and Gatsby fight in the Plaza Suite. Myrtle doesn’t get hit by a car, and no one dies. Instead, Nick gains a little confidence and tells Gatsby the obvious truth that he refused to see. Will Gatsby accept the truth, or will he keep believing in his delusion? How could he possibly love someone even more than Daisy? It was impossible....or was it?





	1. "Are You Blind?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gatsby and Daisy don't leave in his car together. Instead, Daisy leaves with Tom, and Nick and Gatsby get some alone time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So, I write a LOT of fanfiction, but I don't usually share any of it. It's mostly for myself. This is actually the first of my fics that I'm posting to AO3 because a lot of my friends said that they wanted to read it. This isn't a fandom I usually write fic for, so I hope I did a good job lol. Anyway, enjoy!

“You two start on home, Daisy,” said Tom. “In Mr. Gatsby’s car.”

Gatsby had punched Tom, just a few moments ago. Nick just watched. It’s not like Nick could do anything but watch the scene play out in front of him. Now Tom had seemed to recover, somehow with the upperhand, as Gatsby was now flustered and confused as to why Daisy ever loved Tom if she loved him. Daisy just looked to Tom.

“Go on. He won’t annoy you. I think he realizes that his presumptuous little flirtation is over.”

Gatsby’s face showed nothing but hatred - at Tom, at the world, perhaps even at Daisy. She wouldn’t say that she never loved Tom. She… she _did_ love him. She loved that monster. How could she?

“No,” Gatsby said with sudden authority. Everyone in the room looked shocked. “You go with her. And take your own car.”

Tom blinked, surprised, but didn’t argue. He took his wife’s arm, “Come along now, Daisy,” and swept her out of the room. Daisy looked back at Gatsby, saying sorry with her eyes, but Gatsby looked away.

Jordan then excused herself, stating that Tom’s car was her ride home, so she’d need to leave now. She probably also just wanted to escape the tenseness of the room.

That left only Gatsby and Nick, alone.

Gatsby walked over to the window of the suite. He stared out it and wrung his hands. “I don’t- I don’t understand.”

Nick supposed Gatsby was talking to him now. “What don’t you understand?”

“She loves me,” Gatsby turned towards Nick, in that dramatic way that he always moved in, like every little movement of his was important. “At least… I thought she loved me. I did this all for her… And then she just… turns me away.”

Nick didn’t know quite what to say. This whole time, he was trying to support Gatsby and his fantastical escapade to steal Daisy from Tom - to rescue her like a prince rescuing a princess from an evil dragon. That’s all Gatsby wanted to be, wasn’t it? A prince with his princess. He even lived in a castle. But now, Nick could visibly see Gatsby’s fantasy crashing down around him as he realized his life was not a fairytale. His carriage was turning back into a pumpkin, and he was turning back into the poor boy he abandoned long ago.

“I’m sorry, Jay,” Nick said, but he was unsure if he really meant it. As in love as Gatsby was, he still didn’t really have the right to break up Daisy and Tom’s marriage just for his long held fantasy. Plus, Daisy was one woman. There were plenty of other women for Gatsby to like. Plenty of other…people.

Nick swallowed, pushing down the thoughts he was thinking at that moment. He’d… he’d been ignoring them ever since he met Gatsby - ignoring his sparkling eyes and perfect hair and the cute way he called him ‘old sport’. Gatsby was… Gatsby was perfect, the most perfect man. He didn’t start out that way, but he made him himself perfect. He invented himself from the ground up to become the perfect man in front of Nick right now. He did it all to achieve his princely fantasy… with Daisy.

Nick knew he wasn’t a part of Gatsby’s fantasy.

He took a deep breath, trying to bury his feelings again.

“She loves me, I know she does.” Gatsby stared out the window again. He saw Daisy and Tom exit the Plaza. “I’ll get her. I did all this for her… She has to come with me.”

“Jay,” Nick stood up. He walked over to stand beside him at the window. “Perhaps you should just let her go.”

“I can’t,” Gatsby looked up. To Nick’s surprise, there were small tears in his eyes. “I love her.” He slammed his hand against the window. “I love her!”

“This isn’t love, Jay!” Nick caught the man’s hand before he punched a hole through the glass. It was warm. His skin was soft. Nick could feel the cool metal of the large ring around Gatsby’s pinky finger. He looked desperately into Gatsby’s eyes. “This isn’t love! This is obsession!”

“That’s not true! I love Daisy!”

“You are obsessed with a fairytale fantasy of Daisy!” Nick’s breaths were quick. He was nervous. Up until this point, he’d always done what Gatsby said, always supported him. Now, he was changing Gatsby’s story. He was tired of just being a side character in it. “You have tunnel vision, Jay! You look at her and you only see the idea of her in your mind! But that’s not who she is! She’s not your dream woman! She’s not the Daisy in your head that you’ve held to this perfect ideal! She’s not the Daisy you met 5 years ago. She’s changed. Time has changed her. She’s a different woman now. She’s no longer your Daisy.”

“She can be!” Gatsby pulled his hand out of Nick’s grasp. “I just have to talk to her again! I have to get her to see-“

“Are you blind?” Nick raised his voice. Gatsby looked shocked, and so did Nick to be honest - shocked at himself. He tried to push down his feelings again but he just couldn’t. “You are! All you see is her, and you don’t even see the her that’s real! If you just opened your eyes, you’d see she doesn’t want to be with you! You’d see that there are more people than just her in this world!”

Gatsby didn’t respond right away, instead leaving the two men to stare into each other’s eyes.

Suddenly Gatsby’s face twisted in disgust. “You… Of course! Why didn’t I see it before?”

“W-What are you talking about-“

“You _want_ her to leave me! You’re jealous that I love her! You’d rather I be with _you_ instead!”

Nick quickly tried to defend himself. Of course he wanted Gatsby to be with him instead, but he’d accepted that was impossible. He only wanted Gatsby to be happy now. And he wouldn’t be happy pining after Daisy. He was just trying to help. Had his feelings really shown through on his face that clearly? “Jay, I’d never… It’s not like that-“

”I can’t believe you!” Gatsby walked away from Nick and the window, his stylish cane in his hand, and his pink suit gripping tightly around his broad shoulders.

“Please! You’re wrong! I don’t-“

“Don’t lie to me!” Gatsby looked back at him, one hand on the doorknob. “I saw the look on your face. I know that look anywhere. That’s how I look at Daisy. That’s how you look at someone you think is perfect.”

Nick felt called out, because Gatsby was right. Nick did think Gatsby was perfect. “I… Jay, please…”

But Gatsby shook his head. He turned back towards the door, about to open it, when he paused. Gatsby was always dramatically pausing, like he was trained to do so. He stayed there, thinking, for what seemed like a while. Then he spoke again, his voice much calmer, but still not sounding pleased. “Let me drive you home.”

“W-What?”

“I’ll drive you home.” Gatsby turned away from the door and back to meet Nick’s eyes. “You don’t have a way to get home. I’ll drive you.”

“I-I can take the train-“

“Please, I insist.”

Nick hesitated. “I… ok. Thank you.”

“No problem, old sport.”

They were halfway through their drive home in Gatsby’s bright yellow car when Nick spoke again. They had both been silent the whole ride, but then Nick finally said something. He wasn’t sure if Gatsby wanted him to speak, but he did anyway. He just had to ask.

“I thought… I thought, after _that_ , you wouldn’t want anything to do with me. Why’d you offer to drive me home?”

Gatsby didn’t answer right away. When he did, his eyes stayed forward, focusing on the road. “Because it’s not your fault.”

“W-What’s not my fault?”

“That you’re in love with me.”

Nick blinked in shock at the bluntness of Gatsby’s statement. “I-I… well, I-“

“It’s alright, old sport,” Gatsby actually amused now, the smallest of smiles appearing on his face. “I should of known sooner. The first time we met, when you found out who I was, you looked at me the same way as you did in the suite. You’ve stared at me like that quite often, now that I think about it, but only now did I just notice it.”

Nick looked down at his hands in the car. Damn, was he really that bad at hiding his feelings. “So… w-why don’t you hate me, again?”

“Because it’s not your fault. You can’t choose who you fall in love with. I didn’t choose to fall in love with Daisy - I just did. I can’t blame you for something you can’t control.”

Nick was let out a deep breath. Gatsby was… so nice. Understanding. Accepting. So perfect. So goddamn perfect.

“That’s why I don’t understand what Daisy is saying,” Gatsby continued. “She said she loved both Tom and me. But that’s impossible. You can only have one true love. I just have to get her to realize that _I’m_ her true love, not Tom. We are soulmates, like Romeo and Juliet.”

Nick closed his eyes, frustrated. He was perfect, yes, but naive. Gatsby was so incredibly naive. It was so clear that Daisy did not want to abandon her life, her child, and her incredible wealth just to be with a man that she had a fling with 5 years ago. She had moved on, and Gatsby was still stuck in the past, stuck in a fantasy story. Hell, he even compared them to Romeo and Juliet. How did those too lovers end up again?

Nick suddenly knew just how Gatsby felt - yearning after someone whom he could never have, loving someone who was in love with someone else.

They were silent for the rest of the drive.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it! I don't usually write this kind of fanfiction so idk if it's that good. I'm usually writing non-romance Marvel fanfiction lol. If you did like this, I'd love it you left kudos and a comment! More chapters coming soon!


	2. "She's Gone."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nick talks with Gatsby in his garden.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yooo I am so surprised by the amount of comments I got asking for more of this fic! Thank you so much everyone!! I'm so happy that so many of you like this story!! Here's the next chapter and thank you again for reading!!

“Buchanan residence.”

“May I speak to Mrs. Buchanan? It’s Mr. Carraway, her cousin.”

“Madame is not available, Monsieur Carraway. I’m sorry, but they have gone away.”

“Gone away? Do you know when they’ll be back?”

“...No. They have already departed. I have no further information monsieur. Au revoir.”

“...Hello?”

Nick hung up the phone.

Tom and Daisy were leaving town, to who knows where. After what happened the day before, now that Tom was onto Daisy and Gatsby’s relationship, Tom probably wanted to leave as soon as possible.

Nick went over to Gatsby’s house to see if he knew. It was early in the morning, and the sun was shining in the clear, blue sky. The butler walked him into the gardens to where Gatsby was sitting.

Nick took one look at him and knew he’d heard the news.

“I’d warn you,” the butler whispered into Nick’s ear, before Gatsby saw either of them, “Be careful with him. He’s very upset. He threw two of his antique vases at the wall earlier today after he got off the telephone. Then he cried for at least an hour and a half. Now he’s just out here, not saying a word.”

“Yeah,” Nick said back, eyes trained on Gatsby, “Yeah, I know what’s wrong. Thanks for uh, for warning me though.”

The butler nodded and walked back towards the house. Nick hesitantly stepped forward to where Gatsby sat on a bench, surrounded by the pastel-colored flowers of the garden. His face was obscured and hidden behind his disheveled,blonde hair. He wasn’t wearing a suit, just a white button-up shirt, pale gray pants, and suspenders. His shirt was rolled up to his elbows, and his hands were propped up against his thin cane in front of him. Nick thought he looked incredibly attractive, but quickly pushed those kinds of thoughts down. This wasn’t the time.

Gatsby didn’t seem to see Nick, nor hear his approaching footsteps. He was staring at his shoes, lost in his mind.

Nick cleared his throat. “Jay?”

“She’s gone,” Gatsby said, but didn’t look up from the ground. Maybe he  _ had _ noticed Nick approaching after all, and just decided not to look at him or acknowledge him until now.

“I just heard,” Nick said, now suddenly realizing that he had no plan on what to say. “I’m, I’m sorry that it happened.”

“Why are you here?”

“I wanted to make sure you’re okay. But, um, I can see that… you’re not.”

Gatsby didn’t respond for a long while. He just sat there on the bench, breathing deeply, staring downwards. Nick wondered if he should go sit next to him, but decided against it. This was Gatsby’s property, so he’d wait for Gatsby to invite him over onto the bench himself. So Nick just stood there, waiting for Gatsby to speak again, not knowing what to say himself.

Gatsby sighed and now turned his head up to look at the sky. Then he let out a laugh - a sad, weak laugh. “Why is it so sunny?”

“What?”

“There’s not a cloud in the sky.”

Nick glanced up. Sure enough, Gatsby was right. “Not a cloud, yes.”

“On they day me and Daisy reunited, it rained.” Gatsby sighed again. “And now that she’s left me, it’s clear and blue and sunny. Why isn’t it miserable and storming, now that my one true love has left me?”

Nick took a measured breath. “It’s just the weather, Jay.”

“It’s never  _ just _ the weather, old sport.”

They were silent again. Gatsby tore his eyes away from the sky and stood up. He slowly walked around the bench, looking at the beautiful flowers in his garden.

Nick, again, just watched, not knowing what to say. He, even if he was in love with Gatsby, couldn’t help but be mad at Daisy. At both her and Tom, but mainly at Daisy. She didn’t say goodbye to Gatsby, didn’t say any words of reconciliation to him before going off to who knows where. She did still  _ love _ Gatsby, didn’t she? Even if she chose Tom over him. Or perhaps she really didn’t care about Gatsby as much as he and Nick had thought. She didn’t seem to care that she left Gatsby here, heartbroken and miserable, his dreams shattered before him - even if they were unreachable, delusional dreams. She didn’t seem to care at all.

They were careless people, Tom and Daisy. They smashed up things and people and then retreated back into their money and their vast carelessness.

Gatsby plucked a flamingo-pink azalea off of it’s bush, then spoke again, “What am I to do, old sport?”

Nick shrugged. “Well, I don’t know. Perhaps, um, you should go into the city. Do something fun to get your mind of this. It’ll cheer you up a little.”

Gatsby shook his head. “It’d all be worthless without Daisy.”

Nick tried not to look  _ too _ hurt. Gatsby could be  _ so _ dramatic. “Come on. You’re going to have to move on from her. No better time to start than now.”

“Five years!” Gatsby suddenly raised his voice, making Nick jump. “For five years I’ve looked out at that green light and waited for Daisy! And now she was finally here, with me! In my arms at night and everything! And she just…” Gatsby threw his hands up, dropping the azalea, “she just slips away from me.”

He turned away from Nick and put his head in his hands. His shoulders shook with sobs.

Nick couldn’t help but step forward and put a hand on Gatsby’s back. “Hey. It’s going to fine, okay?”

“No it’s not!” Gatsby sobbed. “It’s never going to be ok! She’s gone and she  _ hates _ me!”

“H-Hey, she never said that-”

“Well it sure feels that way!” Gatsby let out a few more sobs, then wiped the tears from his eyes. “Sh-She told me that she wanted to always feel like how she felt when we were dancing. She said she always wanted it to be that way, and I told her that it will be,” he sniffed, “but it’s not! I guess she didn’t want me enough! She didn’t want  _ that _ !” Gatsby gestured up towards his massive house. “She didn’t want all these things I could give to her! All this and more that I got just for  _ her!  _ She just left!”

Nick couldn’t stand to see Gatsby crying. He hesitated, before putting a hand on Gatsby’s cheek, using his thumb to wipe a stray tear away. Gatsby met his eyes.

Nick held his breath.

Gatsby let out a weak smile through his tears. “I’m sure you’re happy about all this, aren’t you?”

Nick blinked, taken aback by the words. “I-I-I beg your pardon?”

“I bet you’re glad that she’s gone. Now you have no competition.”

Nick sputtered, searching for words. “J-Jay, I’d- I’m not, I’m not  _ happy _ about this. Not at all-”

Gatsby stepped away, waving his hand - a tired motion telling him to be quiet.

However, Nick continued to defend himself. “I’m serious! I’m not happy that you’re heartbroken! I-” he hesitated, before stepping closer to Gatsby and deciding that yes, he  _ would _ say this. “All I want is for you to be happy. Yes, I-I may,” he swallowed his fears, “I may have some feelings for you, but I can put those aside. I’ve grown used to putting my feelings for men aside. It’s not hard anymore. No, I just want you to be happy, Jay. All this time, I’ve helped you set up all your meetings with Daisy. I did all that stuff for you and her just because you said to. Just because I wanted you to be happy.”

Gatsby stood in front of Nick, resting against his cane, searching for the words to say. The skin around his eyes was still red from crying. After a while of thinking, he finally decided on his words. “I don’t like men. Not like that.”

“Y-Yes, I know.”

“I don’t. Truly.”

Nick squinted. “Yes…and I said I know.”

Gatsby fidgeted with the ring on his pinky finger. “The city.”

“What?”

“You said I should go into the city. Get my mind off things and all that. Let’s go.”

“Y-You want me to go with you?”

“Yes.” Gatsby turned on his heel and strutted away. “Come now, old sport. We’re going into Manhattan.”

Nick blinked, taking in what exactly was happening, then quickly caught up to Gatsby and walked with him to his bright yellow car.

Nick noticed that he always did as Gatsby said. He always did exactly what Gatsby told him to do, no matter what it was. ‘Invite Daisy over to your house for tea.’ ‘Get dressed. We’re going to lunch.’ ‘You and Miss Baker must join Daisy, Tom, and I for dinner.’ He always did just as Gatsby said. Gatsby didn’t even ask - he  _ demanded _ . They were polite demands, but still demands nonetheless. And Nick always followed them.

Nick couldn’t help but blame that on his feelings for Gatsby. He’d do anything Gatsby wanted him to.

Absolutely anything.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, the next chapter will (hopefully) be published faster than this one one was lol. Thank you all again for reading, leaving kudos, and commenting!! I love reading all your nice comments!


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